Oscar the Offset

Oscar was second son of Leon the 89th. As a boy he was bookish and reserved, but by all accounts not particularly clever. One royal tutor remarked that he was at least "not entirely hopeless" in academic pursuits. It was thought that perhaps he could be a diplomat or low level official. His older brother Lyoron, the heir to the throne, was everything that Oscar was not. He was quick in his studies and equally fierce in his training with the sword. Lyoron was a foot taller and by all accounts more handsome to boot.

It was therefore unfortunate when Lyoron's mare threw a shoe, tossing the prince from his horse and sending him head first into a stone that put Oscar next in line for the throne. This was not the last time that this stone had a hand in controlling the line of succession, but that is a story for another time.

When Oscar was in his early twenties, his father finally admitted defeat in his legal battle to hold onto the throne, and admitted that he would need to hand control of the kingdom over to his unprepared son, who was training in the western lands of the Red Marches. He sent for his son, so that he may be crowned. The coronation was not to take place as scheduled.

Due to a series of comically time consuming errors (such as the procurement of a dog team, rather than horses to pull the royal carriage), Oscar was twenty-two days late to his own coronation. During this period, Egdard the Occasional had one of his unscheduled, but perfectly executed periods of reigns as king of the United Realms. When Oscar finally arrived, it is said that it was just as Egdard finished all he had hoped to accomplish (this time ending with the phrase, "That ought to just about do it"). It is said that he left quietly, passing Oscar in the foyer and giving the bewildered new king a high five on the way out.

Unfortunately for Oscar, the 22 day hiccup in scheduling followed him throughout his reign. For example, he entirely missed the diplomatic summit where Oscar was supposed to meet with the savage Dark Centaurs of the Land of the Umber Shadow to negotiate a delicate peace. Another example was fact that he missed every since one of the annual planning council meetings that took place during his reign. These were where the resource and supply expenditures were reported and decided upon, and great public works commissioned. He also notoriously missed many, many other events, large and small; birthdays (even his own), state funerals, wedding officiation, trials and tribunals, and even his own mother's final days. Even well planned events that tried to take his offset into account inevitably, due to scheduling conflicts, mishap, or perhaps hidden machination, would result in the delay even extending beyond the careful padding added to the date.

Perhaps fortunately for the kingdom, the laws put in place most recently by King Egdard kept the land realms running smoothly in places where Oscar's absence would have been felt, and in all likelihood protected the lands from the muddle that the unprepared and underwhelming Oscar would have made.